I knew it was a check before I opened the envelope. Peeking from behind the window, which revealed my name and address, was the telltale “check” paper.

I tore open the envelope, noted the check amount and dreamed of what I could do with the money. I set it aside to eat dinner. As the high from an unexpected monetary windfall subsided, I recovered my senses.

First of all, why would the U.S. Treasury issue me a refund in a higher amount than what I’d just paid in back taxes? Thirdly, why did they send me a check instead of issuing the refund via direct deposit like all my other refund “checks”?

I’d planned to deposit the check via my mobile app after dinner. Instead, I researched how to tell if a check is fraudulent. While doing so, I learned that one popular scam was to mail a fake U.S. Treasury check, then the IRS con artist calls up the recipient, telling them that the U.S. Treasury had made a mistake. At that point, the recipient has to refund the “U.S. Treasury” the money. The way the con works is that the scammer has to contact the recipient before the check “clears,” which it won’t because it’s fake to begin with.

Here’s what I didn’t understand: how do the con artists know when the check has been deposited? After all, to call before the recipient has deposited it won’t work. Also, waiting too late to call, the recipient would know that the check is fake. How does the con artist know where the sweet spot is?

The check stated that it was good for a year, which meant I had no urgency to deposit it. As a matter of fact, I looked up the number for the IRS, so I can give them a call on my day off. If there was a slim chance that that thing was real, I wanted confirmation. Plus, I could go to my bank one Saturday, and have them verify the check.

In the meantime, I practiced in my head what I’d say to the scammer if they called. Every suspicious call that came in since receiving that check made me wonder if it was the scammer calling. No one left a message. They called while I was at work, so I didn’t answer nor call back.

Trying to talk to a live person at the IRS, was more challenging than seeing the Wizard of Oz without Dororthy’s companions. Out of frustration, I called the number on the back of the envelope. The woman provided me the number for the Department of the US Treasury in Kansas City. When I called the number, a man answered who didn’t bother to ask any HIPAA questions when I said I wanted tto verify if a check was real.

He directed my attention to the QR code in the upper right-hand corner. Beneath the QR code was a number, which I recited to him. He told me the amount of the check and stated that it was real.

In that moment, I thought, “Yeah, right.” So I call the number on the back of the envelope in which the check came and suddenly, I talk not to one, but two live people and the check was real. Well, at least I kept a cool head, noting that after breakfast, the bank would be open and I could open an account with that check. If anything funny happened after I deposited the check, at least it wouldn’t fuck up my money.

I asked the bank employee who stood near the door if she were the manager. She wasn’t, but asked how she could help. I explained my situation. She agreed that I could open a new account. Or, one of the tellers could verify the check.

Once the teller typed in all the check information, she turned the monitor to me, showing me the green check.

After all that shaky shit, the check was real. I went ahead and deposited it, telling all who were listening to my story that they were my witnesses.

Even so, it’ll take me a while to feel okay about letting my balance dip below a certain amount just in case.

Edible Incentive

In a workshop about developing my own personal brand, the presenter stated that a branding statement consisted of three P’s: portable skills (What do I do well?), previous experience (What is my greatest strength/accomplishment?), and personal passion (What would I like to do and why?)

After writing my personal brand, I was about to recycle the piece of paper where I’d written down the template. Instead, I gifted it to my nephew. Figuring he wouldn’t write a personal brand unless there was a proper incentive in place, I knew he had a few things that he would actually work for. The idea of promoting himself to get a promotion was far too abstract.

So, I asked him what his favorite hamburger was. He named two. One I’d never heard of before. Nonetheless, I told him that if he wrote his personal brand, I’d buy him one of his favorite burgers.

Two weeks later, I took a day trip to attend a dance competition. My friend and I grabbed a quick bite at a fast food restaurant where I ordered the burger I’d never had before. One thing for sure, I could only eat the burger in one settling. I saved the fries for breakfast, which I warmed up in an air fryer to get them nice and crispy. Even so, I split half of them with Dad because there were so many of them.

Not only did I want to try out the burger, which wasn’t anything spectacular except for the caloric intake, but I wanted to text the photo op to my nephew. He knew exactly why I’d sent the picture. Even so, he still hasn’t written his personal brand yet.

Although a free burger tends to taste better than one you pay for yourself, my nephew apparently views the job of writing his personal brand a Herculean task.

Nonetheless, I’m not going to nag him about it. If he doesn’t want a free burger, then I’ll save my money. One thing I cannot save is someone who won’t try to help themselves out of a dead-end job.

Miraculous Branding Statement

New Year’s Day Dinner

Superstitious or not, I made sure my first dinner of the new year included yellow food, green food and black eyed peas. My Hoppin’ John wasn’t as “hopping” as I would have hoped since I used the chicken broth found in the pantry rather than looking for the spicy version. No matter. I still enjoyed ringing in the new year with this delicious meal.

The next day, I attended my chair dancing class. I handed out the free samples of topical CBD that I’d wanted to gift everyone two weeks ago when I was dressed as Santa’s Helper. Back then, I thought I’d have a virtual warehouse to take orders, make some retail sales and then have the company handle shipping out the packages. What a difference a fortnight makes!

Instead, I handed out my samples while wishing everyone a Happy New Year. Now that I think about it, it may be better that I’d waited to do that during a non-religious time. The first thing people noticed was the limerick that I attached to the top of the little boxes. The reception was very positive, even bringing smiles to their faces.

After dancing on the pole, chair or floor
When your body feels sore
Feel relief with Topical CBD
Resupply with me
Teresa: XXX-XXX-XXX4

As energized as I’d felt when writing that limerick, I felt even more so seeing their reactions. Time will show how effective a marketing campaign it was. I wonder if anyone picked up on how the last digit in my cell number completes the rhyme scheme? I put several days’ worth of creative energy into the construction of that one limerick.

A few days later, money that I had expected was finally deposited into my account and I still had the rest of the first week of 2023 to look forward to! Especially since I still have five more CBD samples to gift at my pole fitness studio.

In a way, that effort represents money that I expect to eventually deposit into my account. Money seeds that I’m planting this week to reap in the following weeks.

tried to calm down any superstitious belief that my New Year’s Day dinner had anything to do with this week. After all, I’ve made such an effort at least twice before. I chalk this experience up to some years starting off better than others.

Continuing this week’s auspicious beginning, the company’s CEO sent a company-wide email, stating that a “thank you” bonus would be included in our first paycheck of the year. Talk about reading the room!

The cynic in me knew that this bonus didn’t take the place of a cost of living raise, but at least I’d be able to pay off half of my emergency credit card. The sooner I can get a $0 balance on that card, the happier I’ll be financially. Again, another seed planted for greater financial security.

So the other aspect of life commonly revamped this time of year is upping one’s health regimen. Although I’ve continued exercising nearly every day since relocating home, the routine I followed, namely waking up 2.5 hours early to exercise, shower, eat breakfast, then log onto work was no longer working for me.

I rushed, going from one activity to another, especially eating quickly. Often times, Dad joined me for breakfast, but I was too busy wolfing down my food and cleaning up the kitchen to fully appreciate the time.

So, I joined a gym. My motivation to seek out a gym came from a shoulder injury, resulting from a pole dancing class. I knew from past experience that swimming would help my shoulder. I ended the work week swimming laps, followed by a stint in the steam room, then the jacuzzi. Next week, I’ll check out the hot yoga class.

Tweaking my exercise time and location meant never setting my alarm clock again during the workweek, a practice that began during Kwanzaa. Since I didn’t have any saved PTO for an actual vacation, I gifted myself more sleep.

Next week, for the first time in a long time, I’ll be able to taste my breakfast. I’ll stretch a little before breakfast, but not the extensive workout I used to do, thanks to my new exercise routine after work. What I’m really working toward is setting my own schedule since my favorite time to exercise is in the middle of the day.

Right now, the only current opportunity that can set both my finances and time free is my emerging CBD business. With this latest iteration of entrepreneurship, I’ll see how successful my overall endeavor will be.

I started off my Christmas celebration dressing up as Santa’s Helper for the last Chair Dance class before the holiday. My instructor, dressed as the iconic Jack Skellington from “The Nightmare before Christmas,” was the only other person in costume. Although I usually video my weekly chair dance routine to mark my progress, I normally don’t text the link to other people. Yet when I make the effort to dress up for class, then someone other than my parents will see that clip.

Santa’s Helper and Jack

Five days later, an even greater adventure began. Seven family members and I went indoor skydiving on Christmas Eve with my octogenarian parents witnessing. One of my sisters and I treated the family to this experience as an alternative to materialistic gifts.

Sign of Adventure

One Christmas miracle was that the ten of us left the house fifteen minutes later than we’d planned, in two cars and still arrived much earlier than we needed to. Even after weighing in and signing wavers, we could have made the 2:30 PM class except it was already full.

The Crew’s Entrance

The only glitch to the entire experience occurred when we were checking in. At no time did the salesperson tell me that the group package that we purchased didn’t include a high flight. Not really a bait and switch, but the biggest appeal was that the package was the most affordable for that number of people; so, once we arrived, the upselling began. At the end of some awkward discussion, we concluded that we didn’t need to fly high on our first venture.

North Pole Scene

Since we’d arrived an hour ahead of time, we enjoyed watching a father and daughter practicing higher-level skills. Then, the 2:30 class provided a more realistic demonstration of what we’d do.

In Flight Suits

About 15 minutes prior to our reservation time, our trainer asked us to meet him at the desk to receive our flight suits, helmets and other needed attire. The onesie was supposed to be baggy, but there weren’t any wing flaps like flying squirrels.

North Pole Setting

Once suited up, of course we took the requisite pictures in front of the iFly background and the Christmas display. Afterwards, we assembled into the classroom where we watched a short video, which emphasized the hand signals used in the flight chamber. Pointing up meant “chin up,” two fingers up meant “straighten your legs,” and the hang ten hand gesture meant what it always does, “relax.”

My Flight

Since this was my idea, I had to be the fearless leader and go first. I asked if anyone else wanted to go first, but no one had a burning desire to do so. Originally, I had the preconceived idea that there wasn’t a safety net. Once I saw the safety net, I wasn’t the least bit nervous. The air started flowing and I leaned into it with my arms raised above my head.

My Sister’s Flight

My sister, who’d jumped on the opportunity to pay for half and make this her Christmas gift to the family as well, went after me. They made accommodations for her to participate even though she was a whisper above the recommended weight limit. Instead of leaning into the air with her arms raised, she laid on the safety net without any air flowing and two instructors were in the chamber with her. Once the air flowed, the instructors guided her until she was airborne. From there, our main instructor guided her.

The Other Sister’s Flight

In the past, my other sister had arranged many different Christmas excursions, along with her husband. This was the first time that they were treated to a Christmas excursion themselves. Not only that, but they’d never tried indoor skydiving before.

My Niece’s Flight

This niece was the only one who had tried indoor skydiving before. She enjoyed it so much that she’d bought passes for her family, but they hadn’t used them yet. So, it was another Christmas miracle that two of her aunts had the family to try it out.

My Other Niece’s Flight

Full disclosure: I thought out of all of us who were flying that day, this niece would back out at the last minute. I credit her sister for being the biggest influence. Positive peer pressure, if you will.

My Nephew’s Flight

By contrast, I knew this nephew would be all over this experience. He’s the reason I wanted to try parkour. I’ve not gotten around to it yet– if ever.

My Other Nephew’s Flight

If this nephew was at all apprehensive about participating, he hadn’t say anything. As a matter of fact, when we were heading home, I asked him if he enjoyed the experience. He agreed. When I asked him if he wanted to do it again, there was a pregnant pause before he said yes.

My Brother-in-Law’s Flight

I knew my brother-in-law would jump on this experience. He doesn’t let anyone forget that he’s an athlete. His only complaint was that our excursion occurred on Christmas Eve. Normally, he cooks a huge delicious feast; so this adventure delayed his cooking.

Showing Off Our Flight Certificates

After all was said and done, my 82 year-old mother stated that she wanted to try indoor skydiving. Once she saw that we were guided by an instructor and weren’t bumping into anything, she felt that she’d be able to do it. Something to look forward to in 2023!

Christmas Morning Scene

Over the years, Christmas morning has become very mellow since the youngest “child” was 22. I had plenty of time to wake up, get myself together, and take a picture of the Christmas tree.

Protest Tomato Basil Herring Quiche

One unplanned thing before our gift exchange: being snaked into making muffin-sized quiches. When I’d made a similar dish the previous Saturday, Mom loved it so much that she said she’d make that for Christmas breakfast. Mom had bought only one ingredient for the quiches and paid one of my sisters and me to make them. I scavenger hunted the rest of the ingredients, complaining the entire time.

One Happy Customer

The other sister was the first to try them. Even though I made them under protest and with alternative ingredients, they turned out delicious. I’d spent nearly a year making different quiche recipes, mainly with a crust; so this hadn’t been too much of a stretch.

And of course no Christmas celebration wouldn’t be complete with out a Nana/grandson dance off!