At first blush, the title of this post may have led one to the false conclusion that I’m going to talk about the cost of something. In an obtuse way, I guess, I am. Yet after paying the rent, a credit card bill, which included my 6-month car insurance payment and a smaller bill, $1.60 was all that remained until the next payday.
Most would see that low balance and cringe in horror. Not me. As a matter of fact, having some money north of zero was an outright accomplishment, all things considered.
The bank’s email the first morning of that balance got me going. Note: I said “the bank” and not “my bank.” I still don’t claim the bastards that took over my bank.
RIP BBVA Compass
At some point, I’m going to research a better banking solution, but bank shopping is a low priority.
Since I don’t fully trust banks, I thought they were going to charge me a fee for being poor. I’m sure as the economy gets worse, that bullshit will start–charging people money for not having enough money.
The email stated that its existence was triggered because my balance was below $50. I calmed down and waited until they were open. They kept me on hold for about 20 minutes. To my relief, being poor, at least this time, wouldn’t cost me more money I didn’t have.
I received those automated emails daily, reminding me of the low balance. As if I could possibly forget. As if I don’t know when payday is. As if I don’t know that check will evaporate as quickly as its predecessors.
If a human being had sent those emails, I’d accuse them of being passive-aggressive. The disembodied automated reminders still deserved a special place in hell for the humans who set that function up. Again, I’m not dividing what little waking and off work hours to finding out if I can turn that “control” off. The real control I’d like to have is over my financial situation.
Given my recent “raise,” which was so breathtakingly small that it mathematically satisfied the definition of an increase, but economically seemed to be the same as before the raise along with an insult, I’ll have many more paydays ahead of me where I’ll celebrate any positive amount that remains after the bills are paid.
One bright spot: on the next payday, that same alarmist bank emailed me that the low-balance crisis was over. Assholes. Now I have this shit to look forward to about every other month since from here on out until who knows when things will stabilize financially.