Auntie’s Surprise 80th BD Party

I’m always apprehensive to attend a surprise birthday party for an older person. I remember that scene in the movie, “Get Shorty,” where the surprised birthday person has a heart attack. I’d hate to be associated with such an unfortunate event, but my extended family has been smart. We lie to the unsuspecting birthday person about where they’re going. When they walk into the room, we don’t shout or spring out at them. Instead, they notice that they know everyone and see how the room is decorated.

My aunt, typical of her generation, was part of the network of women who knew things because she kept up with extended family. I like to think of them as the internet prior to the actual internet. So, the fact that her family, church family and friends were able to keep this from her for months was noteworthy.

They lured her in by telling her that one of her sons, known for having art shows, was displaying his work at their church. Now, as much as I know of my cousin’s paintings, I’ve never seen anything that one would readily associate with a “Christian” theme, but all artists can branch out.

Fourteen years ago, we had a similarly arranged 70th birthday party for Dad. The lure that time was that the local rec center was having a fish fry, so our next door neighbor easily talked Dad into going to get a plate. Upon entering the room, he noticed that he knew everyone. The difference between then and now, Dad could be easily unaware of things because Mom was the social planner.

This go around, Dad returned the favor, surprising one of his younger sisters.

Both Dad and his sister joined the military. The military took them wherever their skills needed to be in service to our country’s objectives at the time. Even so, Dad’s side of the family wasn’t exactly “close,” as compared to Mom’s. Yet, looking back, I attribute that more to being in survival mode.

Over the years, Dad’s side of the family grew closer. Part of this phenomenon was due to being more sentimental with age, but also, the elders in the family have reaped the benefits of serving and retiring from the military. Unplugging from the daily grind has a mellowing effect.

My aunt had the honor of addressing us prior to dinner. She marveled at how her family managed to sneak this event past her.

In addition to celebrating my aunt’s birthday, we had an impromptu family reunion. This had been long overdue since before the pandemic.

Working for myself for years gave me the schedule flexibility, but never the steady income of an employee. I went from having the time, but not the money. Then after the pandemic, I had neither the money nor the time.

As dinner wound down, we all got the greenlight to share 2-minute memories about my aunt. Three themes emerged during our comments: how mean/strict/brutally honest she is, how each of us were her “favorite,” and no one honored the 2-minute time limit. So, as her favorite niece, I shared how I always thought she was mean, but when I became an adult, I understood her angst. I told everyone that I couldn’t repeat a word that I’d overheard my aunt saying, but I understood what she meant.

Of course, another niece told everyone that SHE was the favorite niece since she got to practice driving Auntie’s car to get her driver’s license.

There never seems to be enough time to catch up with everyone. Now that I’ve moved back to the East Coast, I should be able to visit this side of the family more often.

Fortunately, I got to catch up with one of my cousins who I’m collaborating on an animated project with. Although my part has been put on hold for a minute, I was happy that he continued to illustrate for the series.

One of the most challenging things of the evening was capturing a good picture of these three.

Part of the challenge is that my aunt doesn’t really like to take pictures.

After all was said and done, my aunt revealed a “secret” to me.

Turns out, I WAS her favorite niece! Actually, whether she was serious or bullshitting…that’s her.

Now, of course I couldn’t have the Queen for a Day all to myself for long during a photo op.

Actually, those are my aunt’s children as well. All of whom swore they were the favorite child for some reason or another.

Truthfully, one only wants to have the favor of someone powerful. And lord help you if you fell out of favor.

Some people believe that the youngest children are the loudest because we want to be heard above our older siblings. Whatever the case, all families have their upstarts. I traveled the world as an international math/science teacher and my cousin travels around the world doing missionaries.